Relationships can be a double-edged word. Like domesticated animals, everything is alright until they come biting you for little to no apparent reason.
“They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us: but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us.” – 1 John 2:19 (KJV)
Like everything else in my Life, I took my job seriously and looking back, I almost became a workaholic. I tried as hard as I could to keep an ongoing communication with the outside World and me. I wasn’t as available as I would have loved to be and I didn’t realize how committed I was to my work. I was excited about a potential promotion. It became tricky to make time for Family, Friends and it seemed there were not enough hours in a day to do what I wanted to do. I had responsibilities, deadlines to meet and my sanity to keep in check.
Little by little, without realizing and/or inciting, I started distancing myself from others (and vise versa). Some people were happy for me and stood patiently beside me. Others simply couldn’t bear the silence and absence and decided to keep moving until I caught up to their rhythm, which I totally understood. One individual, whom I never expected and didn’t think was capable of, saw an opportunity to start a feud. That was eight years ago.
It happened at a time when I was deep in prayer for the right direction regarding the relationship. Looking back, I believe this was inevitable. Though not perfect, I was a faithful friend. However, to be blamed for not supporting a hurtful and hateful decision and to be asked to go against my belief – that to me, was the last straw. Keep in mind that, prior to this, I had my own sanity to keep in check. I have always believed that the Lord works in mysterious ways and I know He freed me from a load which wasn’t mine to carry.
I know a little bit about cutting cords and I have learned over the past years when to hang on and when to let go. Often times we stay in a relationship because we are scared of the unknown and we do not believe we can make it on our own. Because we do not believe in ourselves and in possibilities.
“No one is ever alone and silence does not equate defeat.” ― Joan Ambu
Some relationships are meant to be and others not so much. You can know someone all your life and then, out of the blue, the relationship ends. Does it mean either one or both individuals were bad? Maybe, but I think not. It just means that their chapter in the story of each others life is over at that particular moment. Parting and cutting cords doesn’t give us the right to hate or hurt each other. Besides, how does one begin to belittle someone or something he/she once loved without belittling him/her self in the process? Does it hurt? Yes and it will hurt until you learn to take charge of your Life and emotions. Should you regret ever knowing the person? Absolutely not. Hold on to the good memories and move forward with your Life. Our encounter with one another is a life lesson.
Love and Air are two of a few things which should be free. Do not force anything which doesn’t come naturally and remember that those who leave us, were never really with us. What’s the point holding on to them?
By JM Perez
