Children

Proving Yourself Right

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read1.5K views

Yesterday we attended the Sixth Graders Award Celebration at my kids school and I was so proud of my son. He has been on honor roll for seven years straight without fail. Every teacher knew my son or at least heard about him; and contrary to students who request a particular teacher, my son was sought out by teachers and he never let himself down.

Last year, I wrote about the injustices he experienced by his former teacher as well as a few classmates. By mid February, I was fed up and informed the school principal that I was filling a complaint against the teacher after contacting the US Department of Education as I strongly believed that my child’s rights had been violated.

The following week, my son was placed in a different classroom with an amazing teacher.

“Don’t do it to prove them wrong. Do it to prove yourself right.”
Image source: FearlessMotivation.com

Of course I know my children are geniuses, still, I told my son not to worry about what anyone thinks and just be the best he can be. He listened to his new teacher, followed instructions, kept studying hard and it paid off. Nothing changed in his routine and he proved himself right. Prior to giving him an award, his teacher said, this is a kid who came to me toward the end of the school year and described him as “very respectful, polite, kind, helpful and takes his work seriously.”
You should have seen his former teacher’s guilty face when he received his certificates. She put on a forced smile, couldn’t look straight and didn’t applaud when he was mentioned. As long as he proved her wrong, it was all good.

Talk to your children and encourage them on a daily basis. Teach them and make sure they understand right from wrong to avoid embarrassing and unfortunate situations. Don’t sit still when it comes to their rights; you are not alone (even if others make you feel that way). No one is above the law. Speak up and reach out.

I didn’t get rid of my files, I just moved them aside. If I hear about another student being victimized by this female teacher, I will go ahead and file the complain against her and against the school as well since it is known that she abuses her powers and yet nothing has been done to right the wrong.

Toxic Teachers: The Silent Bullies

JM Perez By JM Perez6 min read1.9K views

When the bully oppresses you without using words …

Child abuse just doesn’t happen at home. It happens everywhere, especially at schools and from the individuals you would suspect the least: teachers. It seems to be a growing trend lately. Teachers, the silent bullies. These abuses are not limited to assaults, public humiliation, unfair grades, isolation, discrimination,  etc. Bullies are finding new methods to upgrade their game and it is our duty as parents to be watchful.

For the first time in the eight years that my son has attended an elementary school, he is dealing with a teacher who doesn’t like him and who is trying her best to fail him wherever and whenever possible. My son doesn’t slack off and has always been an A student for the past 7 years (above grade level). Every single one of his previous teachers had nothing but good thoughts and best wishes for him. This year, he’s met someone who wants to break his spirit: Mrs. Diaz.

I remember a few years back, when teachers would either call a parent with concerns or send a note home. Things were really good then because of the ongoing communication. Now, some teachers think they can toy with our children just because, you know, they have some authority over our children while we are not watching. My kids are extremely respectful and their greatest flaw is that they are perfectionists and sometimes too smart for their own good. I have an accent due to the fact that I went through a French education system and I have always encourage my children to correct me whenever my pronunciation is off.

A couple of weeks ago, during parent-teacher conference, I realized that my son’s teacher is holding a grudge against him for correcting her in front of the whole class. Mind you, she didn’t bring the issue up until I asked about his behavior in class to which she responded, “he’s rude to me, correcting me all the time.” This is a woman who says she doesn’t believe in punishment, yet she doesn’t hesitate to sanction my son based on her mood of the day. Of course, I apologized and asked why I wasn’t notified of it. I instructed my son right there to stop correcting her. She went on bragging about working towards her master’s degree and her years of teaching. She made the mistake of telling us a story about refusing to help a former student who used to be rude to her. Red flag! Did this woman just tell me she will ruin my son’s life if he keeps on correcting her? Is this behavior acceptable to anyone? For a school with bad ratings and extremely low rankings, these are the type of teachers they hire? Are they just out to destroy our children? And we wonder why our children are struggling so much! Go figure!

Pulling someone down will never help you reach the top.

This school strongly believes that the bad behavior of a single student should tarnish the entire class. The school seems to take pride in this strange idea. The principal says he doesn’t agree with it; however, he told me straight out “I can’t do that” when I suggested he could advice his teachers to stop penalizing the whole class for the behavior of one student. He doesn’t agree, yet he let’s it slide?  This is abuse!
They threaten students to sit them next to someone they dislike/don’t get along with, if they don’t behave. I know this for sure because I talk to other parents, to other kids and to mine. How do you think these kids will feel toward a classmate who gets them punished every time because of the classmate’s bad behavior? Isn’t this another way of encouraging bullying? Am I missing something here?

Sure, they have fun activities for the kids, none of which really help struggling students to learn, read or write.  How about we start listening to parents’ concerns and get those kids some much needed help? What exactly are they celebrating when their school is doing so poorly? 4827th of 5,662 California Public Elementary Schools (rankings for the 2017-18 school year, via SchoolDigger.com). I personally know two parents who took their bright kids out of this school due to discrimination and bad management. Most teachers are great and you can tell teaching is their calling. Others are show-offs who yearn for recognition and play favorites (these are the ones who always look forward to teacher appreciation week).

“Now, we must all fear evil men. But, there is another kind of evil which we must fear most and that is the indifference of good men.” – The Boondock Saints

The thing I despise most at this school (and everywhere else) is the fact that some teachers deny kids their right to use the bathroom and force them to hold it. The idea of maintaining control over kids has gone too far. They will give you excuses such as allowing kids to use the bathroom disrupts the class or that kids just want to go out and play (some probably do).  What about when the teachers need to leave? Don’t they go as they please, as often as they please and stay as long as they please?
No excuse gives them the right to put our children’s health at risk. In my daughters class for instance, points are deducted each time (from the group table where the kid seats) whenever a kid from that table leaves to use the bathroom and in other classes, the kids have to move their pin down whenever they go. What if a child develops urinary tract infection, kidney failure from bladder pressure or bowel obstruction, will the school take responsibility? We cannot tell kids when to go and when to hold in waste because that’s not how the body works. This is not right and it’s not a healthy thing to do. This is abuse and neglect.

My kids cannot function properly without water and they need plenty of it throughout the day. At every start of the school year, I make sure their teachers are aware of it. And I also request that they please allow them to use the bathroom whenever they need to. I have seen too many kids covered in waste because their teachers told them to hold it and they couldn’t. I am grateful for my well behaved children, who know to respect their teachers and understand that they are in charge of their own bodies. I have instructed them to politely request to step out when needed and to step out anyway, if their teachers deny them the right to do so.  It is their right.

“Educate your children about abusive personalities, to prepare them for the possibility of meeting such people.” – Joan Ambu

I know we are busy as parents, but please, please, take a few minutes every day to talk to your children. Find out about their day, ask if anything good or bad happened at school and how their teachers treat them. Get involved. Many kids are struggling, not because they are not able, but because they are being silently bullied by their teachers and they feel like they have no voice. Be their voice. Be their strength. Fight their fight and win.
I spoke with a few good teachers who want to see change at the school. But when the head is rotten, what do you expect? Good teachers are a school’s greatest asset, they shape and impact student lives. These students, in turn, are what make the school great.

Here are a few red flags you need to pay attention to:

  • When you raise concern and the teacher ignores you (they are guilty or simply don’t care)
  • When your child complains about a teacher and begs you not to report ( they are afraid of retaliation)
  • When the principal has no interested in getting involved (it’s a toxic school)
  • Bad grades or drop in grades if your child was great (the teacher is discriminating)
  • Stress, sadness if you had a joyful child (abusive teacher)
  • Sudden loss of interest in everything (verbal, mental and psychological abuse)

I don’t think the school will change unless someone steps in and cleans house. You know birds of a feather flock together. Every end of year the school sends out a form to rate its performance for that year and gives opportunity to parents to tell them what they like, dislike and what changes they would like to see. I thought it was a wonderful idea, unfortunately there hasn’t been a single change or improvement (none that I have seen to date).

People don’t change, they adapt when odds are against them. I urge you parents to talk to your children and file complaints with your districts if the schools are unwilling to work with you. Hopefully a higher authority will  rid these toxic schools of their bad seeds.

Update here.

DIY: Pilgrim House

JM Perez By JM Perez1 min read4.4K views

Today I am going to share a DIY Pilgrim House we helped our daughter build for her class project.

Pilgrim House.

Materials/Tools Needed

  • Popsicle sticks
  • Glue Gun and Glue Sticks
  • Cardboard
  • Beads
  • Hay (we used Aspen pads for the roofing)
  • Elmer’s glue
  • Spray Paints
  • Paint or Markers

Step by Step (for this project):

  • Cut out pieces of cardboard and put the walls of your house together
  • Cut out a piece of cardboard for the roof and set aside
  • Build your chimney and attach it unto the roof
  • Using your glue gun, glue the Popsicle sticks unto the walls of the house, except the roof
  • Spray paint the walls of the house, let dry and secure the roof
  • Build a door and window using Popsicle sticks and paint them
  • Generously apply Elmer’s glue unto the roof and secure your hay
  • Apply glue using the glue gun to the base of the house and stick to the floor.
Pilgrim House.
Pilgrim House.

It was a fun project to work on and the reward was equally great!

DIY: Ocean Diorama [2]

JM Perez By JM Perez1 min read1.3K views

Below is a beautiful Ocean Diorama we helped our daughter create for her school project.

Ocean Diorama.

Materials/Tools Needed

  • Paper Clips
  • Plastic Boulder
  • Glue Gun and Glue Sticks
  • Box/container (we used the base of a Plastic Cake Container)
  • Plastic Sea Plants
  • Plastic Ocean Creatures (or cutouts from drawings or Magazines)
  • Spray Paints

Step by Steps (for this project):

  • Spray paint the base of the plastic cake container to look like water.
  • Figure out the placement of the animals, boulder and plants.
  • Straighten out a couple of paper clips and then bend them to shape to hold the animals in a floating position.
  • Hot glue the stones and synthetic plants on the floor of the diorama.
  • Make sure that you are able to put the cover back on at the end to protect it.
Ocean Diorama.
Ocean Diorama.

Have fun creating your own Ocean Diorama!