Death

Personal Quest Death Inspire Gratitude People

Peace Within a Grieving Heart

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read556 views

Early this afternoon, the mail man delivered a special package. Inside this package were some souvenirs Mom brought back from her recent trip to Cameroon and France. I have been looking forward to seeing its content, even though I wasn’t sure how I would react and how it would impact my current state of mind. One is never too prepared for what to expect in life. Today, after fifteen years, I got to see my sister’s beautiful face before her final rest. I remembered all the little details on that treacherous Saturday morning of May 2nd, 1998.

For the first few days following her burial, I looked at her pictures every night after prayers and before going to sleep. I couldn’t find peace and rest the night I skipped the routine. Her still images were a tremendous source of comfort and I was so grateful that she could bring so much peace within my grieving heart. Some days I would be at peace with the facts and during others, a flow of sorrow would come upon me unexpectedly.

Photo credit: Brad Browne.
Photo credit: Brad Browne.

Going through a damaged and incomplete album this afternoon, I was overcome with anger. How could those entrusted with its safekeeping allow it to be exposed to the elements and others, since there are pictures missing. I had to calm myself down and remember that everything I need is indelibly imprinted on my mind. Nothing and no one can take away the memories of a loved one or the truth I’ve come to know. Today I wept, felt anger, laughed and experienced once again the peace that comes from acceptance and letting go.

My heart goes out to my Mother and I will live the rest of my life doing right by her, God being my helper.

We must all face loss at some point in Life. When it happens:

  • Give yourself plenty of time to grief. As long as you’re not planning on harming yourself or someone else, there’s no right or wrong way to grief. Deal with it your own way.
  • Talk about it. Reach out to someone you trust and open up.
  • Seek professional help when needed. Get some support to help you get through it.
  • Be gentle with yourself. It happened and nothing you do now will turn back the clock.
  • Strive to find joy and the will to carry on. Start by recalling the good memories and building on them.

“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break.” — William Shakespeare

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Science Fiction Books Death Love Gratitude

Cocoon of Grief

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read684 views

“Soul of Christ, sanctify me,” he said. “Body of Christ, save me. Blood of Christ, inebriate me. Water from the side of Christ, wash me. Passion of Christ, strengthen me. O good Jesus, hear me. Within Thy wounds hide me. Suffer that I not be separated from Thee. From the malignant enemy, defend me. In the hour of my death, call me, and bid me to come to Thee, that with Thy Saints, I may praise Thee for ever and ever. Amen.” — Battletech: Warrior: Riposte (A Warrior’s Prayer).

Two weeks have passed since my friend left the World of mortals and I haven’t stopped crying. His death hurts as much as my Sisters’. I cry so much that my 3-year-old would come up to me, give me a hug and say, “that’s enough Mommy, that’s enough.” I am so thankful for my family for understanding and giving me some personal space to mourn my friend. I have learned some years ago never to question the Will of God as Isaiah 55:11 states that God’s spoken Word will not return empty to Him without accomplishing the purpose for which He sent it.

Last night after putting my kids to bed, I found myself thinking about some individuals whom I miss and who are no longer in my life. I unintentionally read a note my now deceased friend wrote me 20 years ago. I probably shouldn’t have because it did me more harm than good and by the time I realized what I had done to myself, I began praying for myself. He was my silent warrior and the only friend who called me by my last name. When asked why, he said he loved who I was and not what I was. He saw me past my shell.

We Will Meet Again.
Image Source: QuoteFlicker.com

I miss each and every one of those beautiful souls so much and I can only hope that they are now where they deserve to be (rejoicing with the Almighty). The pain is constant. Often as dormant as an inactive volcano, patiently waiting for the right moment to erupt. The Bible advises and cautions us not to dwell on the past. Worrying is an energy drainer and a dead-end. It weigh us down, it robs us of joy and inner peace, it traps us and we are never free. I know I will meet them all again, the day the Lord calls me Home. For now, I will keep moving forward.

“Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. ” — Philippians 3:13 (KJV)

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Death Strength of The Small

Bille Mba’a Stephane {Memory of}

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read671 views

“There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” – Gandhi

This morning I learning of the death of my dear and beloved friend, Stéphane Yves-Alexandre, gone to never return. Gone to the land of immortals, free of pain and prejudices. Your journey has just begun.

Stéphane Yves-Alexandre was an amazing person. He was a good friend to me and he reached out so many times when the World seemed not to pay attention and I thanked him, though I’m not sure I thanked him enough. I Love You, Alex. I will not speak of you in the past because you are ever so present in my heart. You mean so much more and nothing will ever fill the gap.

I join my voice with Angels and a million others to pray for the peaceful rest of your Soul. Thank you for sparing a few minutes of your time to talk to me a couple of months ago. You are a beautiful person, a kindhearted man and we will all miss you. It was a pleasure knowing you and an honor walking the Earth with you. I am praying for the loved ones you left behind, that they may find peace, comfort and strength in the Words of our Almighty God, to deal with challenges ahead.

“Nothing is really lost in the World; everything is preserved.” ― Joan Ambu

“Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.” ― 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14

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Blessings Scripture Personal Quest Death Faith Love Family

Reminiscence

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read798 views

“The best effect of fine persons is felt after we have left their presence.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

I remember as a little girl, sitting right across my sister and mimicking her every move. While most little girls thought their Mothers were the most beautiful person in the World, I thought and I knew my Sister was the most beautiful person in the World. I loved and admired her so much that I was for her and into her. Though she loved to tease me, she always made sure I was taken care of. She was three classes ahead of me and at the end of school she would wait for my brother and me and together we would walk back home. Sometimes during rainy days, when the thunder would be so severe that I couldn’t sleep, I would jump off my bed running to her for comfort.  She would always receive me with open arms. Those are blessed good old memories.

Today marks the fifteen anniversary of her death and the fourteen of my beloved grandmother. In the mean time I have had the opportunity to find out my strengths and weaknesses, as well as whatever else I am made of. Over the years, my faith has been tested (and is still being tested) in so many ways and stretched in all directions to mold me. Mold Me Lord, shape me, feed me Lord. With your knowledge that I may absorb and retain …

As I am looking forward to seeing what He has in store for me, I now have a good idea of why I am still here and what He desires from me. I am in awe of Him and the transformations in my Life.

There isn't a day that goes by where I don't, at some point, think of you.
Image Source: Pinterest.

CANDLE-LIGHT

Day has its sun,
And night the stars.
But God has candle-light.
Upon the world’s great candle-stick He sets
The little taper of yourself ashine,
That when the sun has sputtered out
And all the stars are dead,
Your immortality may flame and burn
Across His infinite immensity forever.

Wherefore He will sometime blow out the sun,
And snuff the stars,
Preferring candle-light.

— Sister M. Madeleva, C.S.C.

“So shall My word be that goes forth from my mouth; It shall not return to Me void, but it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.” — Isaiah 55:11 (NKJV)

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Death Strength of The Small

Eric Aseneh {Memory of}

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read714 views

Friday, November 30th was a very sad day for our Family, as we lost one of our own. We lost a good man. Eric was a Son, a Nephew, a Father, an Uncle, a Cousin, a Brother. He was a beloved Child of God who fought the good fight till the end. Eric was an amazing inspiration and a wonderful example of what Philippians 4:13 is all about. He was such a loving person and he will be greatly missed.

The Bible teaches us to give thanks in everything (1 Thessalonians 5:17-18). Even in suffering, God wants us to give thanks and trust that He will get us through. Eric’s new journey has just begun. Let’s give thanks to God and ask Him to welcome our brother and to keep him close until we meet again.

Please, pray for us, as we mourn the lost of our brother and prepare to lay him to rest. Pray that we find the peace of God that comforts and restore. Pray that we may be released from the pain that is weighing down our minds. Pray that God rest his soul.

Eric was a good man with a good heart and like any other human being  he had his flaws. Let us forgive any missteps that may have given us the wrong impression of his true feelings.

Family Standing Together (Buea – Cameroon, 1976).
Eric Aseneh
(April 5, 1965 –  †November 30, 2012).

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.” – John 14:1-2

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